Funny Halloween jokes, weird or plain stupidFor that season of the pumpkins :)
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Halloween Jokes
other funny forwarded emails
can be downloaded from:
https://www.edlin.org/sitemap.html
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Why didn't the skeleton cross the road?
Because he didn't have any guts
Why did the mummy take the stress reduction class?
He was all wound up
What do goblins mail home while on vacation?
Ghost-Cards!
Where did they put Dracula when he was arrested?
Into a blood cell
Why do vampires always use mouthwash after every meal?
So they won't get bat breath
How do you know a vampire is getting a cold?
When he starts coffin
Why doesn't Dracula have any friends?
Because he's a pain in the neck
Why is there always a fence around a cemetery?
Because people are just dying to get in
Why do vampires drink blood?
Because coffee keeps them up all day
Why does a ghost have trouble lying?
You can see right through him
Do monsters like to eat popcorn with their fingers?
No, they prefer to eat fingers separately
How do you keep a skeleton from laughing?
Take away his funny bone
Where do little ghosts learn to yell "BOO!"?
In noisery school.
What does a goblin shop for?
Grosseries.
What do you call serious rocks?
Grave stones
How does a witch travel when she doesn't have a broom?
She witch hikes
How many witches does it take to change a light bulb?
Only one, but she changes it into a frog
What kind of horse does a ghost ride?
Night mare
Why do witches fly on brooms?
Because vacuum cleaners are too expensive
How did the monster predict his future?
With a horror-scope.
What is a vampire's favorite breed of dog?
Bloodhound
Why do vampires tend to make great artists?
They got lots of practice drawing blood
What is a vampires favorite holiday?
Fangsgiving.
What spook lives in the "hundred acre wood"?
Winnie the Boo
What do spooks call their Navy?
The ghost guard
Where do vampires go to deposit their savings?
The blood bank
Why was the boy unhappy to win 1st prize for the best costume at the Halloween party?
Because he had just come to pick up his sister
Why couldn't the skeleton go to the dance?
Because he had no body to take
What flies through the night, has a black cape, and bites people?
A mosquito wearing a black cape
In what room of the house would you never find a ghost?
The living room.
How much does a truck full of bones weigh?
A skel-e-ton
How do little ghosts get to school?
On the ghoulbus
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